Evergreen-ish

I sat on my mat this morning, half sick with a cold that doesn't make asana-sense, but quite capable of morning meditation.


So, I sat. And like most times, the first 5-10 minutes are the most monkey-mindish. 
And then I placed Om with my inhales and exhales, visualizing the symbol within my third eye. 

As I sat, I began thinking:
Evergreens
Christmas trees
Nature
Divinity
Atman soul
Evergreens being the divine tree, never dying, like the glowing Atman
Without veil--maya--
Heart.


And the next thing I knew I was "seeing" a snow capped mountain, wondering
how that was/is related to evergreens...possibly that a mountain
doesn't die or change either--maybe the landscape, but at the base--
it is always a mountain.


Like it is always a tree.
And the divine light shining
inward,
shines outward...
No matter what time of the year.


Om.

Tat Twam Asi

This past year in reading one of Swami V's books, I came across the mantra:
Tat Twam Asi


Though translated in various English phrases, "That thou are", I didn't really understand what I was supposed to understand about who That and Thou are.

And when I can't understand something, I don't force my way to the path, but I do open up the lines of communication to get to the path.

I read the phrase over.
And over.
And over.
I put it on my phone, so there it was/is--along with the picture of my family.

I let it happen.
And finally it did.

I read somewhere else a different sort of translation--
Tat: My soul/atman/innermost being connected to the
Twam: Braham/God/Universe
and bringing it all together in this great big connection is
Asi: Union

And  there you go...I got it.
Well, at least for now--a beginning of an understanding,
that may or may not be how I interupt it tomorrow.
:)
Om xoxo

Word of the day: kula

I don't remember if it was my family, teachers or both, that instilled the idea of learning a new word a day.

It seems the concept should partner people together, but I suppose it doesn't matter, because in the end--I still-- almost at 40-- try to enhance my vocabulary.

So my word on Monday was kula: meaning family or group.
If you look up kula via wikipedia, you'll discover it means different things in different languages.
I am interested in the Sanskrit interpetation of the word, even though according to the New World Encyclopedia it is a difficult word for English interpretation. 

Personally, I don't see the difficultly in it.
I know there's the saying we can pick our friends, but we can't pick our family.
First off, I don't buy that saying.
I think we come to this place, this space, choosing our family and friends to love and learn about and from...but if not--then at what point do we acknowledge our family brings us lessons and ideals to learn positive and negative from?

Ok. Then there's this looseknit idea of 'family' --the people we mean to spend our time with.
On purpose.
With intention.
Friendships.
Relationships.
Working relationships.
Spiritual community.
Our kula.
Tightknight group of folks who love each other or at least tolerate.

If we are fortunate, we have a supportive immediate and extended kula.
And if we don't--we should honor our inner light, to place our Being towards the highest.

On Monday evenings class, I threw out the word kula while they were in childs pose, explaining the meaning of family.
I don't get into my personal beliefs too much, but try to share philosophy and ideas that correlate to the practice.  One thing I did say was that when dealing with our kula, our family--our base--we can use the chakras or energy centers in our body that coincide with words and ideas, to help us.

Our base chakra or muladhara chakra is said to reside at the base of our spine.
It's what keeps us stable in relationships, work, family.
And seeing how we're coming upon the holiday season, this chakra can take a beating...dealing with positive and negative past family baggage or even work that we're trying to accomplish before our time off.

That's when we need to ground ourselves.
So--Mondays class was full of grounding poses.
Heart opening poses through grounding poses, that hopefully offered insight or thoughtfulness.

I enjoyed Mondays class because I realized I spoke as I usually write.
There's a true gap between what I physically say versus my written word.
I feel more comfortable writing, sharing what may or may not be accepted.
But what I've been striving to find in my teaching is this voice I carry through writing, into my real-life teaching.
And what I feel comfortable in doing is sharing words.
Sharing stories.
To me these are real 'things' that people can carry in their heads in a positive way.

Sharing with their own kula.
Family.
Om

Saucha

On my hands and knees, mopping my floors, the word 'saucha' popped into my mind.
Saucha is one of niyamas in yoga philosphy, meaning purity or cleanliness.  Dealing with my household,
I find it the most difficult.  Once upon a time, my girls were young- I was married and worked very part time. 
My household was never perfect, but it was much more tidy.
Then my girls grew alittle and I was no longer married, working two full time jobs.
My household was less than perfect and hardly tidy.

And then yesterday, with my youngest at home sick, I took/take such joy in being able to clean--truly clean.
Not the surface wiping, but getting into the corners and delving into the practice--delving into saucha.
At a certain point, I remind myself--this is not permanent...the cleaning, the messiness--the moment.
Soon there were a housefull of girls rearranging any order I may have illusioned myself into creating.
And then that will disappear too--but I will have the thought and the word to ponder on:
Saucha.

Plus, I have other positive purities within myself--my household that I can see the abundance in and appreciate. It is a constant practice. Much love.
Om.
xoxo

Satya

On Thursdays I teach a vinyasa 715 am, work 9-530, then teach beginners 730pm class.
It's tiring.  Not the teaching, but the work day sandwiched between classes.  My girls aren't thrilled
about me teaching an evening class, but the calling is there and I'm in the state of believing it will
work itself out.

Most weeks, as I grow in my practice, I try to find a word or something higher to bring into my class.
For me, I have a bigger fear in sharing my spiritual side than teaching asana, so I do my best to bring my
language in the forefront..at least in my mind.

This morning as I was glancing through Yoga Journal, I read their featured article on Tree Pose. 
I liked how they brought Satya into the description.
Satya means truth.
Unchangeable truth.

So, as I spent my day running this word through my head, I discovered it was easier to speak about satya in the evening than the morning class.  In the AM, I had just read the article.  It needed time to marinade in my brain. By tonight I felt better in my sharing of the word. The concept.
I didn't get totally into it---I may soon, but I realized that the body is not satya.
The mind is not satya.
Only the spirit, connected to higher, is truth, unchangable truth--along with 'god'...whatever that may be.

I also began class asking them to think of something they are proud of within themselves. 
We spend so much of our time trying to get better at this or that. Faster. Quicker. Skinnier.
When we already have so many things we are excellent at...what we are holding as truths to ourselves.
I liked that.
I like setting intentions too--but that sometimes points out the less than positive traits we think about within ourselves.
We're awesome people.
Maybe you rock at washing the dishes.
Maybe you sing in the shower beautifully.
There are qualities we should love about ourselves and share readily.

In satya.
love.
Om

Perspective

Perspective with my hands.
Perspective with my body.

As I work through my down dogs
upward
into
Warrior 1,
I find cactus arms
into straight arms up high
extending forward
placement between eyes

And I think,
it's all perspective.

Sometimes we can see plainly what is in front of us...
other times we are looking around what is right before us,
while other times we are looking too closely in the present.

It all shifts.
Our perspective.
Upside down.
Rightside up.

Finding the moments to be in that change,
loving what is.

Slowing down

Sitting in the sunshine, with a cup of coffee this early morning, I had a flash of meditation vs. the work week.



Often times meditation comes at the end of asana.
Our body has worked with our mind through all these poses, sometimes surging memories with present issues or simple joy.  And by the end of our practice, most people can sit.
Simply sit.
Much easier.

So, as I sat this morning, I thought about how joyous the simple act of sitting is--after a week filled with loving obligations, laughing and tears of exhaustion.
It is a gift.
Sitting.
Meditation.
Slowing down in the presense.
Putting the highest first.

Open heart, Open spine, Open words

I began slow
creaking morning body on the mat

listening to green tara
protector
remover of lions and greed
in balasana
arms overhead
fingers interlaced

onto my back for biking the agni path
rolling my spine
so divine
warming for the sunny salutes

head back
fingers interlaced
heart reaching towards the sun

Warrior 1: What is story?  What is your stance on Issues 1, 2, 3?

Lunge into peacefulness
dropping your sacrum
bending your knee to twist
your heart to the other side of the world
to the twisty parvokonasana
unwind
bind and travel again
Child
your hero
called your camel to finish
your heart

resting your legs up the wall

to begin the day

Family, svaha!

Often times
I recall
family

Often times
I wonder
about similarities
differences
joy

Often times
I inhale
exhale
svaha
woohoo
hail!
love

for
family

Morning practice

My morning practice was slow and undecided.
I am trying to incorporate more standing poses into my practice...for two, of probably many, reasons:
1)Students tend to love them..I suppose it's where they feel grounded in the practice; knowing whatever I may offer to them before or after, they are able to stand in their place for the moment.  I practice what I teach.  Often obsessively--just to make sure it's safe and playful.
2)I need to ground myself more often.  I am airy. Creative. I love vinyasa movements, linking my moves as if I'm dancing through my practice--how I most often approach life...but sometimes I need to stand still. Stand up. Be planted in my views and know it's ok to feel the way I do, even if it's only a present moment.  Placement. 


Once I got moving, feeling the space--I found some fluid movements...working through spinal rolls, twists, incorporated backbends and side stretches into goddess.
I enjoy creating what seems to be new approaches to me to the simple movements I've done for 15 years...it adds that spark to my moment..to the beginning of my day.


Om

Expectations create separation

Expectations create separation...we expect from ourselves and loved ones in so much of our daily lives. Learning to let see the space between expecting and non-expecting, brings us closer to living consciously with those around us.


Lots of lunges, thigh stretches and standing poses...what I don't do alot of.
They scare me.
Strength.
Posture.
Moving forward I suppose.


What I am moving towards in my home practice.
Without expectation.

morning practice

Lots of spinal work:

head rolls,
front to back

into cat & cow

shifting hands out forward
knees back
wider cat and cow

into down dog

fly throughs

back to beginning

sun salutations

chair
twist chair
triangle
bound triangle
parvatonnasana
bound parvatonnasana

chair again
bakrasana

floor to fish variations

shoulderstand variations

supta baddha konnasana

get ready for savasana

om

Embracing your You-ness
6/24/11

The word yoga literally means “to yoke” or bring “union.”

But what are you bringing together?  You are bringing your individual “you-ness” together… the body and mind.  Ultimately, living a yogic lifestyle leads to the ultimate union of self-realization and liberation.

Just as each person is different, we come to yoga for different reasons.  Maybe you’re here today because your parent or friend or sister wanted you to come or maybe you wanted to see what yoga is about.  Many people think of yoga as an exercise, others view it as way to help them relax, but really anything we do can be yoga when we practice with mindfulness or being present.

Yoga philosophy came from India.  It is thought to be over 3500  years old.  It is not a religion, but a way of life.  Just like there are different streets that can take you home, there are different paths or “streets” of yoga that take you to the same place inside.

The paths are :
Karma
Jnana
Bhakti
Ashtanga/Royal
Hatha
Mantra

In the United States most people think of yoga in the physical sense. This is the Hatha path, or doing asana.  

Imagine your best friends are having a party.

You have to prepare.
You’re standing in front of the mirror...what do you see?




What do you like?

What do you dislike?



We all dislike things about ourselves at one time or another.   And sometimes as we grow, we are harder on ourselves than we need to be...We can actually train our thoughts to help us grow.  We can observe and honor them.  

Thoughts are amazing things.  We don’t think about this much, but truly thoughts are just like objects. They have different shapes and colors.  When we are angry with someone, it is like shooting arrows or daggers at them through our aura’s.  The color around this thought is red.   We can change this.   We can catch our thoughts and replace it instantly.  We are responsible for what we think and how we react…beginning how you think about YOU!

This can even be about you!
Sometimes when we wake up our hair doesn’t seem to cooperate or we feel fat or our clothes don’t match right.  This can make us angry, but you have the power to change that thought or moment.  You can catch that thought and flip it!  You can replace the negative with the positive.  Think about what you like about you!.  And take control of that thought.  

Honor yourself by taking care of you.  You don’t need to obsess about friends, looks or clothes, but when you take care of yourself you are proud!  You are confident! And you attract the good stuff to you.

Speaking of...who are you?

Think back to your earliest childhood memories.  What did you like to do?

As an example, I liked to play outside, climb trees, draw, read, write, have friends, love others and experiment with nature.  Use this space to write and draw your personal memories!

You are who you are.

That’s kind of a big statement.  It probably won’t change much in your lifetime.  Your friends may change.  Where you live, what you wear and the color of your hair may change--but what creates the spark in you...the life energy, prana, will be the seed  of your core.

That’s why it’s so important to love yourself.
Sometimes as we grow we feel like we need to be fixed to be loved or even lovable, but that only comes from not loving certain parts of ourselves.  

What don’t you love about yourself?  Why?

It feels that girls are not supposed to be seen as angry or jealous in our society, but it is an emotion. Emotion.  We have so many of them!!  Happy. Sad. Joy. Envy. Jealousy. Thankfulness….the list goes on and on!   It can be helpful to think of our emotions  like our own children.   There was an old lady who lived in a shoe..she had so many EMOTIONS..she didn’t know what to do!!    But you can know what to do!  You can take care of them, helping them grow up --so they can eventually move out on their own.  

The next time you get angry or have any emotion you are aware of, just sit with it.  Accept it.  Consciously breathe into what you are feeling, knowing it is apart of who you are...you can tell yourself,   “I love myself in the midst of jealousy/anger/wanting her life/car/hair/boyfriend/family”.  Remember, all people have emotions.  Positive and negative.   You become a better you when you can choose your response to your emotions.  And that is not an easy thing to do!

Try this:  Think a happy thought.  Now think a sad thought.  What changed?  Only your thought.  So if you can change your thought, you can say “I love myself.”

You might feel a little silly doing this, but that’s completely ok!  The sillier the better!  It’s healthy to be able to laugh at yourself!! Find a mirror, maybe in the bathroom, bedroom or hallway—wherever you might have a few moments of privacy and tell yourself:

“I love you!  You are beautiful!  You are smart!  You are strong!  And all the other wonderful things that make you –YOU !  Doing this on a regular basis will truly help you love you!

Wanna have some fun loving you?    
If you have any Expo or dry erase markers, write on your mirror--only if it’s ok with mom &dad...I love myself! Plus write all your most positive, coolest, silliest qualities.  They make up you!

But who are you?  You wrote your childhood memories and even though you are who you are, what does that have to do with being a teenager?   Everything—because you are who you are!
Think about yourself as a seed, having all the beautiful things qualities you are able to bloom into as you grow up.

What is important to you?  Think of 3 things you are passionate about…3 core values.  These are like your internal compass, helping you cultivate your authentic self, so you can make choices based on who you are--not what you think you should be!

What are your gifts?  Your talents?  This could be being an artist, trustworthy, athletic, kind, good with computers...anything!
Now how can you put those your values and your talent together? 


Also, try to be open to new experiences.   You are who you are, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try new things.  As people, we are constantly evolving into ourselves!!  We aren’t going to be perfect in this life, but we can learn to love ourselves along the way.  


We don’t wake up one day and know who we are--but we remain open to experience and joy.  Love sits in your heart.  To love we must be present.  Present in ourselves. And to be present for others.  

In your journal, write 3 things of what you are grateful for everyday.

So-Ham mantra: “I am this or I am that” 

Inhale So, exhale Hummmm…It’s a relaxing mantra that is helpful in breathing.

Imagine the sun shining in the space above your navel and below your ribs, your solar plexus.  It is space full of light and love, offering energy and the spark of life…taking 10 full deep breaths, move into this space.  Think of something you’re thankful about.

Peace & Love,

Beth

yogawithbethany@gmail.com  

Twisting nights

Tonight I focused more on floorwork, beginning with

Uttasana, folding deeply from my hip creases touching the ground with my hands.
Holding.
Holding.
Holding.
Until I brought my arms in reverse, letting them fall overhead.
Release my arms into
tabletop.

Cat/Cow
Downdog
Uttasana...over and over again.

Ardha Chandrasana.
Standing Splits
Uttasana.
Both sides.

Cat/Cow
Downdog
to my belly for rock the boat baby, tip the boat over...
Boat Pose.
Half Frog.

Then for extended straight legs and lottsa twists.
Rishi Twists 1,2,3

Floor Twists

Savasana...ahhhh...

During all of this I felt my body releasing pressure I've let build.
I'm feeling mixed feelings about not doing any real teaching, since I've acquired my
200 hours.  But really--it isn't that I'm worried about $, I just don't want to lose my momentum or my teaching ability.  While I was doing this tonight I wondered if maybe this is my personal practice being able to deepen...I have the time I haven't had for months. 

Just going to let it all unfold.
Twist into place.

Namaste

I taught my first "official" class this morning.
I had one person.
A teacher herself.
And I felt blessed to have her there.

I feel like I have this big, wonderful teacher in me--but fear is holding
my tongue.
What is going through my mind and how I filter is huge.

A filter is a great thing.
But, sometimes fear makes the filter --the veil-- stronger than it needs to be.

I feel as I continue, my teaching veil will thin--
like my bellydance veil:)

Which I begin again this Sunday!!  Yay--can't wait to do alittle shimmy xoxo